He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
