Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
where am i from again
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
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