I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize