He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize