I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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