I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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