Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
