he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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