Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
