Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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