Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Why is your signature on my underwear?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I can't turn off my feet"
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
