Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize