best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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