You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
