My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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