I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
