scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
