he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Use "feeling words"
Yay
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize