Fuck appropriateness.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
