My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
