Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Ketchup is God's man juice
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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