We're like a lot better than the average bears
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
