The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
