i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.