who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
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