I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize