don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
