Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
