i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Randomize
