Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize