sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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