He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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