Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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