there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
