seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
