she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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