Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Randomize
