is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
