PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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