Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
