i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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