My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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