Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I have demons in me.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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