Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
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She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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