Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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