I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
