I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Randomize
