in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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