i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
