where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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