Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
