I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Still dying that you shit outside
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
